My trip to espain

Last month we were on a vacation in Spain, or as the locals call it: Espain. We think that’s in Spanish.

Spain is a beautiful, beautiful country with awesome weather, the nicest people and the most fried food we have ever eaten. Me and our sister were down in Andalucia, where we ate some doughnuts at Duffin Dagles, which we know is a copy of Dunkin Donuts with ice cream, but we loved it because they had a tahini filled donut; enjoyed the “nice breeze” in Tarifa, which was more like the windiest place on earth and apparently has the highest rate of suicides in Spain – they say because of the wind, and honestly we kinda get it; we saw 2 caves along the way, but without neanthertals in them and climbed the highest Spanish sand dune in Bologna beach every single day for 3 days.

And we visited Gibraltar. 3 times.

And all 3 times there was a kilometer long line to enter Gibraltar. Because it’s awesome. It was hot, annoying and we were burning in the sun, but it was worht it.

This is a view of Gibraltar airport – the only airport, crossed by a main road – the main road has to be closed when an airplane is landing. We think this didn’t happen when we were there.

And this is our favorite thing about Gibraltar – their monkeys. It was the first time that we see monkeys walking around minding their business, taking care of their babies and hygene in the middle of the street.

They were the cutest and most human-like creatures we have ever seen and we love them, even though one or them almost stole our wallet.

IF YOU EVER VISIT…

If you’re ever in Andalucia and visit because of long white beaches – choose Bologna Beach over overcrowded Malaga, Fuengirola or Marbella – the beaches there are ok, but the sand is grey and Bologna Beach has the highest dune, a horse and a reliable white sand around. Also it is not as windy as in Tarifa, which took us by surprise with that wind. Seriously gone with the wind.

This is Tarifa Beach after a serious wind.

We went there to visit for 1 day – and on that day it was quiet, hot, the water crystal clear and just beautiful. We guess it was one of the few calm days during the year. Then we booked a hotel there – and surprise-surprise, 100km/h wind. It was like the end of the world. We never knew that getting hit with small sand flakes could hurt so much – as if you get acupuncture everywhere without even ordering it – more like as if you’re a dart board and someone is hitting you with small tiny needles. So lying on the beach was not an option – and many other things besides going from one coffee place to the next one weren’t as well.

WHAT ABOUT THE FOOD

One thing that struck us in Spain was the food. We always read that the Mediterranian cuisine is to be made example of, the healthiest and just the godsent angel in disguise which will heal all of us. We must say we've never felt so bad in our life as after 2 weeks of eating out in Spain. And we know now Spanish people will want to lynch us for saying that, but hey – they almost lynched us already with that food and the wind in Tarifa.

We're not saying that everything tasted terrible. The contrary – everything was satisfying, but way too salty, way too sweet, way too fried and waaay too mouldy. Yes, we had a toast with mold on it. Of course we ate it – we had paid for it. And we only saw it was moldy, when we were half-way done – what am we supposed to do? A little penicillin didn’t hurt anyone.

But Spain is full of fresh vegetables and fruits (which are obviously not used in restaurants). For the first time ever in our life we saw an avocado tree. Not too impressive, but we were excited as if we saw a monkey. And the supermarkets were so great. Does it sound… like bad, that we spent 40% of our vacation time in the supermarket looking at their stuff? We just love to see what they’re selling there. And we're telling you – Spanish supermarket is the dream for every vegetable fan out there. In fact the dream of any food fan there. Fresh vegetables, fresh seafood and fish and a lot of meat. Now we didn’t eat meat and we seemed like the weirdoo, since everyone was cutting the leg of some animal.

The first few nights we had an appartment where we could cook, so it was solid. We wanted to move into that place. Beautiful view, terrific weather, nice pool, plenty of space, and just a reliable freshest ingredients that you could get anywhere. And the tomatoes tasted like tomatoes. Those were the most satisfying three days of the trip.

From there on we could only eat in restaurants. Enter everything fried, mayonnaise, no veggies and sugar-filled donuts called duffin dagles. In the beginning it was satisfying, but as the first week went by we found myself fighting with our sister over a cabbage salad. Repeat – A CABBAGE SALAD! Not a salad made of something else – made of cabbage! Nevertheless we survived with a tiny lil bit of scurvy and got a lot of vitamin D – which was expressed in a nice skin rash caused by vitamin D overdose. We're just glad nobody we knew saw us – and it explains why most pictures we took were landscapes or monkey portraits. They just look better and deserve it.

The good thing is now we only want to eat vegetables and legumes, our rash is gone, we had a great time and we're super-determined to get rid of the vacation fat on our belly.